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T O P I C R E V I E Wsarahhmsince like February i've been a right damn mess.and i've been like this since then. there was some stuff in november too but the depression, no focus, crying every night. that really kicked off in feb. in the last few months:t. north node in 6th houseconjunct chiront. chiron in 12th house opposite chironsquare moontrine venust. neptune in 11th housesquare plutoopposite marssquare jupiterconjunct saturn exact t. saturn in 7th house square saturnt. pluto in 9th houseconjunct sunconjunct mercuryconjunct uranusconjunct neptunesquare plutotrine chirontrine MC t. jupiter in 5th houseopposite saturnconjunct chiron t. mars in 7th housesquare marssquare saturnconjunct plutot. uranus in 12th house (in aries thats also intercepted(square mercurysquare MC____i'm exhausted. i've been fighting this since it started and i just want to give up. there seems to be no more light. i can't keep crying every night. all my old wounds are open. i've never felt so alone in my life.i don't know what else i can do to keep going. mztinyMy dear Sarahhm....we are in a #9 year (it's a nine year cycle) this is the year to let go of whatever you started 8yrs ago. It is a very spiritual year, things are surfacing for you, so that you can then release them. Meditate, breathe.....When you can, please post a picture of your most recent solar return, that should help us see what is going on. bacioHey there, that's DEFINITELY a ton to be grappling with, I'm glad to see that you're extending a hand! That alone takes a lot of strength, and you deserve to credit yourself for that strength.I'm seeing a lot of self-squaring planets (mars, saturn, pluto), which i associate with periodic reassessment. Things in life have progressed enough for your current accumulated (and/or discarded) experiences, emotions, ambitions, companions and possessions to no longer jive in some fundamental way with your nature. Are you unhappy with the actions you choose to take, or are you stifled by people or situations which stunt your efforts? Are you happy with the ways and situations iin which you find yourself in control or taking responsibility? Are your intimate relationships characterized by troubles regarding domination or hyperactivity/intensity? Would you mind posting which houses/signs your natal planets are in? Im wishing you the best of luck no matter what and sending my best vibes.sarahhm quote:Originally posted by mztiny:My dear Sarahhm....we are in a #9 year (it's a nine year cycle) this is the year to let go of whatever you started 8yrs ago. It is a very spiritual year, things are surfacing for you, so that you can then release them. Meditate, breathe.....When you can, please post a picture of your most recent solar return, that should help us see what is going on. here's my solar return, i hope you're right. i just can't take another month of this **** . something has to give. there needs to be like a break for a week or two so i can regain a bit of strength to keep going. sarahhm quote:Originally posted by bacio:Hey there, that's DEFINITELY a ton to be grappling with, I'm glad to see that you're extending a hand! That alone takes a lot of strength, and you deserve to credit yourself for that strength.I'm seeing a lot of self-squaring planets (mars, saturn, pluto), which i associate with periodic reassessment. Things in life have progressed enough for your current accumulated (and/or discarded) experiences, emotions, ambitions, companions and possessions to no longer jive in some fundamental way with your nature. Are you unhappy with the actions you choose to take, or are you stifled by people or situations which stunt your efforts? Are you happy with the ways and situations iin which you find yourself in control or taking responsibility? Are your intimate relationships characterized by troubles regarding domination or hyperactivity/intensity? Would you mind posting which houses/signs your natal planets are in? Im wishing you the best of luck no matter what and sending my best vibes.i've come out of denial about the abuse i experienced as a child. no more shoving it down and playing it off. realised how much it actually has affected me. i have complex PTSD and i'm working to try and not become like my parents (abusive and narcissistic personality disorder). didn't realise how ^ stuff had been affecting my relationships, at least the full extent of it. it's always been difficult but now more so. i'm trying to cope by reading about conflict resolution. but yeah a lot of issues with control vs freedom. which is difficult with my abandonment issues. a lot of wanting the intensity of intimacy and wanting to close myself up and not wanting anyone to know anything deep about me. i don't know. i acknowledge that theres a solid portion that comes from me but at the same time i'm facing more resistance than ever.thank you for the vibes CondoowitTo the OP (Sarah). There are many people going through personal crises at this time, not only b/c of astrological alignments but also b/c of energies that are being beamed at humanity by benevolent forces aligned with G-d, all in an attempt at raising our light quotient. I won't get into details now, as I have to run off to my job.There are a number of us all over the world who are certified in a healing modality known as Angelic Reiki. Look it up. This modality can help you tremendously with the psychic pain of having old trauma resurface. Any one of us, I'm sure, will be happy to do a remote or in-person healing session for you. I myself am in New York but I do remote sessions for anyone anywhere. I don't know what part of the world you're in, but I will be happy to direct you to a practitioner. You can get my contact info from Randall.Whether you choose to go this route or not, I hope that you hang in there, as this is only temporary.Koniucha quote:Originally posted by mztiny:My dear Sarahhm....we are in a #9 year (it's a nine year cycle) this is the year to let go of whatever you started 8yrs ago. It is a very spiritual year, things are surfacing for you, so that you can then release them. Meditate, breathe.....When you can, please post a picture of your most recent solar return, that should help us see what is going on. What do you mean by 9 year cycle?Condoowithttps://youtu.be/b-qzsHO19uQI really like this guy's take on what's going on astrologically.mztiny quote:Originally posted by Koniucha: What do you mean by 9 year cycle?In Numerology each year is equivalent to a number. This year is number 9. 2+0+1+6=9 #9 is the Hermit Card (tarot) very spiritual card. Next year the cycle starts all over again with #1 (magician card-tarot) (2+0+1+7=10=1) *always add the numbers down to the smallest number.Nonetheless the cycles are 1-9#9 is the last card of the cycle, where you let go of what you started 8yrs ago. mztiny quote:Originally posted by sarahhm: here's my solar return, i hope you're right. i just can't take another month of this **** . something has to give. there needs to be like a break for a week or two so i can regain a bit of strength to keep going. Thank you for posting but I need to see the SR ascendant. This looks like just your transit chart.sarahhm quote:Originally posted by mztiny: Thank you for posting but I need to see the SR ascendant. This looks like just your transit chart.it's my SR chart with transits on it. my ascendant is 28 degree scorpiosarahhmbumpmztinyOk, I'm not an expert but SR ruler is Scorpio (pluto) in the second house. Second house (includes 8th house) Pluto/Scorpio/2&8 house...all these add up to a possessive personality. Hard to let go of things....EVERYTHING MATTERS. It's a hard energy on anyone....especially if your natal is very different. You have venus transiting your IC, venus even as beautiful and protective as it is....can be VERY emotional on the IC....that is very hard. Nonetheless I still go back to the #9 year....all this energy is surfacing so you can LET GO of the past...look to the future.It will get better... FaithHi Sarah,Sorry you feel so bad. Some of the transits you posted are too wide to still be considered. Care to post your birth chart, so we can hone in on the most severe transits?Also, sometimes it's better to focus on the solution than the problem. What can you do to feel better?
and i've been like this since then. there was some stuff in november too but the depression, no focus, crying every night. that really kicked off in feb.
in the last few months:
t. north node in 6th houseconjunct chiron
t. chiron in 12th house opposite chironsquare moontrine venus
t. neptune in 11th housesquare plutoopposite marssquare jupiterconjunct saturn exact
t. saturn in 7th house square saturn
t. pluto in 9th houseconjunct sunconjunct mercuryconjunct uranusconjunct neptunesquare plutotrine chirontrine MC
t. jupiter in 5th houseopposite saturnconjunct chiron
t. mars in 7th housesquare marssquare saturnconjunct pluto
t. uranus in 12th house (in aries thats also intercepted(square mercurysquare MC____
i'm exhausted. i've been fighting this since it started and i just want to give up. there seems to be no more light. i can't keep crying every night. all my old wounds are open.
i've never felt so alone in my life.
i don't know what else i can do to keep going.
When you can, please post a picture of your most recent solar return, that should help us see what is going on.
I'm seeing a lot of self-squaring planets (mars, saturn, pluto), which i associate with periodic reassessment. Things in life have progressed enough for your current accumulated (and/or discarded) experiences, emotions, ambitions, companions and possessions to no longer jive in some fundamental way with your nature.
Are you unhappy with the actions you choose to take, or are you stifled by people or situations which stunt your efforts? Are you happy with the ways and situations iin which you find yourself in control or taking responsibility? Are your intimate relationships characterized by troubles regarding domination or hyperactivity/intensity?
Would you mind posting which houses/signs your natal planets are in? Im wishing you the best of luck no matter what and sending my best vibes.
quote:Originally posted by mztiny:My dear Sarahhm....we are in a #9 year (it's a nine year cycle) this is the year to let go of whatever you started 8yrs ago. It is a very spiritual year, things are surfacing for you, so that you can then release them. Meditate, breathe.....When you can, please post a picture of your most recent solar return, that should help us see what is going on.
here's my solar return, i hope you're right. i just can't take another month of this **** . something has to give. there needs to be like a break for a week or two so i can regain a bit of strength to keep going.
quote:Originally posted by bacio:Hey there, that's DEFINITELY a ton to be grappling with, I'm glad to see that you're extending a hand! That alone takes a lot of strength, and you deserve to credit yourself for that strength.I'm seeing a lot of self-squaring planets (mars, saturn, pluto), which i associate with periodic reassessment. Things in life have progressed enough for your current accumulated (and/or discarded) experiences, emotions, ambitions, companions and possessions to no longer jive in some fundamental way with your nature. Are you unhappy with the actions you choose to take, or are you stifled by people or situations which stunt your efforts? Are you happy with the ways and situations iin which you find yourself in control or taking responsibility? Are your intimate relationships characterized by troubles regarding domination or hyperactivity/intensity? Would you mind posting which houses/signs your natal planets are in? Im wishing you the best of luck no matter what and sending my best vibes.
i've come out of denial about the abuse i experienced as a child. no more shoving it down and playing it off. realised how much it actually has affected me. i have complex PTSD and i'm working to try and not become like my parents (abusive and narcissistic personality disorder). didn't realise how ^ stuff had been affecting my relationships, at least the full extent of it. it's always been difficult but now more so. i'm trying to cope by reading about conflict resolution. but yeah a lot of issues with control vs freedom. which is difficult with my abandonment issues. a lot of wanting the intensity of intimacy and wanting to close myself up and not wanting anyone to know anything deep about me. i don't know. i acknowledge that theres a solid portion that comes from me but at the same time i'm facing more resistance than ever.
thank you for the vibes
There are a number of us all over the world who are certified in a healing modality known as Angelic Reiki. Look it up. This modality can help you tremendously with the psychic pain of having old trauma resurface. Any one of us, I'm sure, will be happy to do a remote or in-person healing session for you. I myself am in New York but I do remote sessions for anyone anywhere. I don't know what part of the world you're in, but I will be happy to direct you to a practitioner. You can get my contact info from Randall.
Whether you choose to go this route or not, I hope that you hang in there, as this is only temporary.
What do you mean by 9 year cycle?
I really like this guy's take on what's going on astrologically.
quote:Originally posted by Koniucha: What do you mean by 9 year cycle?
In Numerology each year is equivalent to a number. This year is number 9. 2+0+1+6=9
#9 is the Hermit Card (tarot) very spiritual card.
Next year the cycle starts all over again with #1 (magician card-tarot) (2+0+1+7=10=1)
*always add the numbers down to the smallest number.
Nonetheless the cycles are 1-9
#9 is the last card of the cycle, where you let go of what you started 8yrs ago.
quote:Originally posted by sarahhm: here's my solar return, i hope you're right. i just can't take another month of this **** . something has to give. there needs to be like a break for a week or two so i can regain a bit of strength to keep going.
Thank you for posting but I need to see the SR ascendant. This looks like just your transit chart.
quote:Originally posted by mztiny: Thank you for posting but I need to see the SR ascendant. This looks like just your transit chart.
it's my SR chart with transits on it. my ascendant is 28 degree scorpio
Nonetheless I still go back to the #9 year....all this energy is surfacing so you can LET GO of the past...look to the future.It will get better...
Sorry you feel so bad.
Some of the transits you posted are too wide to still be considered. Care to post your birth chart, so we can hone in on the most severe transits?
Also, sometimes it's better to focus on the solution than the problem.
What can you do to feel better?
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